Monday, December 15, 2014

Why are you doing this? 

When I first was baptized into the church, my family was less then enthusiastic.  My dad threatened to kick me out, told me that he would never let someone in a "cult" live in his home, and didn't speak to me. While my mom just broke into tears and kept saying, "WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME? DON'T YOU CARE ABOUT OUR FAMILY?" I knew that when I made that decision, it was going to be difficult, but I never anticipated how hard it would be to get through it.

For a long time, there was no talking to my parents- I was treated as if I didn't belong, like I was hated. I was expected to buy my own food if I wanted to eat, and I was threatened with paying rent, and taking away my form of transportation to and from work or school, and said that I didn't care about my family. And it hurt like no other. There is no worse feeling than to feel rejected by the people that are supposed to love you unconditionally. There's no worse feeling than to know you're family will treat you that way based on the church you attend. There's no worse feeling. And as hard as that was, that was only the beginning.

I knew because of the way my family felt about my church there was no way I was going to be able to serve a mission or even get married in the Temple right away. I didn't even think I was going to be able to share that part of my life or introduce them to my friends who are members of the church. I really truly believed they would hate me and my church for as long as I lived. That I would have no relationship with them. Everyone kept telling me, "They will come around. Things will get better." And I knew that was true, but I don't think I truly understood how true that could be.

The Lord, my friends, really does provide miracles. And as I'm preparing for my mission, the realization hit me. My parents ARE supportive of my mission. Like what?! I never thought I would see the day where they tell to go out and preach the gospel of the church. Like what?! (It's so crazy I had to say it twice). And while they are not so found of some things about serving, they still want me to go. I have proof that The Lord does give miracles. To me, it's my modern day parting of the Red Sea- my parents being able to see what matters most to me, looking beyond themselves.

And while, again, this is only just the beginning, it's a small part of my life that has given me a huge blessing. I have seen that by trusting Heavenly Father and following His promptings in my life, that He will bless me. It may not be easy, but, it's worth it. I have seen the blessings that have come from it.


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